The Best Advice I can Give to a Twin Flame “Newbie” & the Main Differences Between Twin Flames and Soulmates

Make sure you check out the video below the article!

So, you might have been experiencing something different in a new connection, something deeper, something more spiritual and you take your inquiry to Google and search your symptoms. Soon enough the term, “Twin Flame” pops up and you dive deep into the wormhole that is the “Twin Flame” label. Now, the term “Soulmate” has been a mainstream term, but the “Twin Flame” label is fairly new in the mainstream area. The problem with the label “Twin Flame” becoming more and more popular and mainstream, is that the label comes with certain expectations and certain so-called “rules” and “stages” and even a specific end result with “union.” This is what I find problematic when it comes to the label becoming more and more mainstream. People find the label, attach the label to their connection, they start to “play by the rules” of the connection (so to speak) and do what various content creators tell them to do (without even hearing their story or knowing where they got their information from), and expect to get the other person back into their life. When that doesn’t happen, they say “it’s not common for Twins to end up together” or “you have multiple Twin Flames”. NO! The whole premise and one of the main differences between the term Twin Flame and Soulmate is that Twin Flames do end up together and that it is all about a massive spiritual awakening, an inner journey triggered alone by the connection itself (not just small lessons here and there triggered by the other person); and that it is one soul that split into two separate-but-whole souls incarnated at the same time. Many people out there online DON’T include these aspects in their “Twin Flame Signs” videos and articles, which is one of the reasons why the Twin Flame label and Soulmate label have somehow blurred together and part of the reason why the label has become more mainstream, and now it seems “everyone has an incarnated Twin Flame”. It’s not a “Twin Flame Connection” just because it is intense and there is distance, other marriages or other obstacles, signs, difficulties, etc. A soulmate is not always an easy connection either. Many of the other “Twin Flame signs” can be applied to a soulmate connection too. People are ‘wanting’ the “Twin Flame Obsession” versus a genuine spiritual journey and experience genuine spiritual growth, which is what the Twin Flame connection is all about. They focus on getting information from outside of themselves, whether it be Facebook groups, psychics, gurus, etc. versus doing the inner work and getting answers from within. They want to put all of their focus on the other person, calling them “unawakened” or any other similar term and put all of their baggage and responsibility onto the other person. The whole dynamic sometimes is that of “love” and then “hate and anger” two seconds later, without any actual spiritual journey as a part of the dynamic. That’s not what the connection is supposed to be about, it’s the complete opposite. It is much more than drama/over-romanticism/intensity/familiarity/synchronicity/lessons/running/chasing. It triggers a massive spiritual awakening that is triggered by nothing more than the connection itself, not necessarily the other person, although it can be a part of it. It simply just brings the unconscious to conscious for healing. You don’t even need the other person to be around after meeting in order for it to happen. If you have found yourself in a [soul] connection where some of these themes are present, but the connection itself has not triggered a massive awakening [I’m not talking little lessons here and there] avoid placing the label on the connection. If you found yourself in a connection where these themes are present, Googled your “symptoms”, found the label, and only THEN started doing “the work” – avoid placing the label on the connection.

The best piece of advice I can give a “newbie” is to let go of the label. Just see it simply as connection. The Twin Flame label (“TF”) can bring expectations and complicate the journey. Connection will be and serve its purpose in your life regardless as to what you label it. There is nothing wrong with, “I just feel deeply connected to this person, I don’t know exactly what our future holds, or what other purpose(s) this person has in my life, or how the other person feels in this moment, the only thing that I know is what I feel and what I feel is connected to this person.” Don’t allow the label to dictate your behavior. The change in behaviors comes from the changes within you! Not from asking folks, “My TF blocked me on social media, what should I do?” or “My TF is married, is it okay to cheat with them?” This is NOT how the process works (again, it’s about getting inner guidance, not outer guidance). See my Related article below on “What NOT to do in a Twin Flame Connection.” Of course, the “TF label obsession” can be a part of the journey, but in continuing your self work, you’ll move past it. Seeing it as just “connection” removes the expectations and mystical stuff that tend to come with the label. The “TF woo woo mystical stuff” clouds the process. Don’t worry about or get into the mystical stuff – at least not right away (especially if you cannot or will not verify that stuff with them in 3D). Thinking about or worrying about “5D sex” or “5D conversations” etc. doesn’t do anything to help you heal your inner wounds. I’m not against those types of things, but what I am saying is if you spend your time thinking about those things and less time healing yourself, you’re running from yourself [so don’t be surprised if they’re running too if this is genuinely the connection that you are experiencing].

Years ago there wasn’t much online about the TF label/journey/experience. There were a few folks ‘out there’ but the majority of the information was pretty ‘separate’ from the Soulmate (“SM”) label. Everything essentially matched up (for the most part). The “Twin Flame Signs” actually included the massive spiritual awakening “sign” in the more popular videos/articles. Fast forward and I don’t know how it happened, where it came from, but now there is seemingly “no difference” between the TF and SM “signs” online now in certain circles, etc. You wanna go down a spiritual rabbit hole? Google “Twin Flames.” Folks applied the label to connections that may not have been TF connections (after all, one of the main factors of the TF label/connection is for union to happen eventually & a massive awakening). Through this the “multiple TF” theory emerged and the “TF rarely reach union” stuff. I do feel like some of this is partly the fault of the known “cult-MLM-like entity” that is out there online (clue: the last word in the business name is Universe). Stay far far away from this company and those associated. There is information out there about them should you seek to verify this. If you see information or a video with the term or that uses the term “harmonious union” and not just “union”, or “ultimate lover” in my opinion it is likely that this company is behind said information/video and you should take the information with a grain of salt. I will say real fast that I do believe that everything happens for a reason and there may be a reason why someone is attracted to the label etc. etc. BUT I also believe that the community needs to be dialed back a bit when it comes to what the label actually means/is. Otherwise, what is the difference between a SM and TF then? What is the whole point of having two words that mean the same thing? A SM connection can be just as tough as a TF connection & similar in dynamic wise, so separating the two into “SM is easy, TF is not” isn’t right…besides, the TF label has always required union as a factor in the connection – which is one reason why I have so much of an issue with the label being as widespread as it is now. Who is anyone to tell someone else how they feel? Who is anyone to tell someone else what their future holds? If they have told you “in 5D” they love you, cool. If that’s not what they are saying in 3D, then don’t project your feelings onto them about how they feel. Yes, they might be lying or denying, etc. and there is nothing wrong with saying, “I feel like they feel the same about me as I do them.” But it is wrong to outright tell someone else (like a friend) or tell them how they feel for sure because of “5D conversations” without anything in 3D backing it up. We are not mind readers, the telepathy doesn’t necessarily work like that. There is a difference between saying, “You love me in the same way I love you” and “I feel like you love me in the same way I love you.” With all of that said, nobody; no psychic, NOBODY can outright tell you who is or isn’t your TF. If a psychic (or espectially coach) tells you this, take it with a grain of salt as we should with anything we see a psychic for (we are our own best spiritual guides and a good coach helps you get closer to you, they should be more of a guide than guru or teacher). Again, I am not against the mystical stuff – but it is important to remember to stay grounded in connection. The label sometimes gives people reasons to stay in toxic situations and also gives other people a reason to try and keep someone else in a toxic situation. Remember, connection is not felt with the mind, it’s felt in the heart. A label is just an aspect of the mind.

Much love.

Read my next post on this topic here:

Make sure you check out the two Related articles and video linked below for more.

Check out my blog’s Facebook page and Pursue You Coaching Facebook page for more information and join my Facebook Group or contact me at for a FREE 30 minute session. You can also check out my YouTube Channel: Pursue You Coaching

Don’t be shy, feel free to leave a comment with your thoughts!



Related [If you are feeling “stuck” on your journey]:

Published by Pursue You

Life, Relationship, and Spiritual Coach. I also coach soul connections such as twin flames and soulmates.

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